Video Of The Week

Fraggle Rock

Children of Tomorrow

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Question Of The Week

Question of the week: When you were in school did you ever make up a rhyme or little saying to remember something?

My youngest daughter made the mistake of asking me what year Christopher Columbus discovered America the other day. I told her:

In 1492 Columbus was a Jew,
He sat on the grass,
Which tickled his ass,
in 1492.

My mother told me that little rhyme when I was a kid and it is the only way I can remember when Columbus discovered America. 

I use Never Eat Shredded Wheat to remember  North, East, South and West. Another one I have is My Very Excellent Mother Just Sent Us Nine Pizzas for Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune and Pluto.

And It Trickles Down…

The other night my 17 year old daughter and I were playing a card game in the living room and half listening to the nightly news on the TV. They had a story on about President Obama’s education plan. They basically were talking about giving schools government funding based on merit.

Here in Texas we have the Texas Essential Knowledge and Skills or TEKS test that the kids have to take at certain grade levels. If they don’t pass it they don’t graduate. Since they have started this testing many years ago that is all they teach. They teach the kids how to pass this test instead of giving them the education they need to pass it. The schools are given money based on the scores the students receive.

My daughter asked me what Obama’s education plan meant for her and I told her for her it would mean more of the same. They were going to put more pressure on the student’s to pass these standardized tests instead of actually teaching them.

My 17 year old daughter’s response to this was, “How stupid is he? Now he is starting to piss off the younger generation! Not a smart move by him especially since I get to vote next time!”

She amazes me some times! Just when I think she never listens to me she comes up with something like this!

From The Mouths Of 10 Year Olds!

Yesterday my youngest daughter celebrated her 10th birthday. She invited two of her classmates to come to our house have pizza, cake and then go to our neighborhood pool. Now keep in mind that all 3 of the girls are 10 years old and they go to a Catholic school!

This was the conversation they had on the way to the pool:

My Daughter: “How do you like my tattoo?”
Friend #1: “Cool. Have you seen the guy that has tattoos all over his body?”
Friend #2: “Yeah, he even has them DOWN THERE!”
All 3 girls start to giggle loudly.
Me: “Where did you guys see this?”
Friend #2: “At school. It was in the Guinness Book of  World Records in the library.”

So much for sending them to Catholic school!

This was the conversation they had on the way home from the pool:

My Daughter: “We sure did grow over the summer!”
Friend #1: “Did you start yet?”
My Daughter: “Yeah, mine has little purple bumps on it.”
Friend #2: “I have one that is pink and the other one is white.”
Friend #1: “Boys are lucky, they don’t have to worry about them.”

They were talking about wearing bras!

My oldest daughter was sitting up front with me in the car. We looked at each other and just lost it. I had tears running down my face while trying to drive Thank goodness we weren’t in a car wreck! I can just imagine myself trying to explain that to an officer!

The kicker of the week was last night when my daughters and I went to the grocery store. There was an older oriental lady wearing a bright pink tank top with really tight black leather pants walking in front of us down an aisle. My oldest daughter and I looked at each other and just giggled. My youngest daughter turned to me and said, not so quietly, “Oh my God! Her pants are so tight you can see her wrinkles when she walks!” I quickly turned my basket around and went down another aisle!

 

 

Video Of The Week

Dinosaurs

 

Question Of The Week

Question of the week: Beatles or Rolling Stones?

 

I would have to pick the Beatles myself. The first song I learned how to play on my guitar was Day Tripper. I remember in 5th grade music class we sang The Yellow Submarine and all my classmates were shocked that I knew all the words without having to look in the book. My favorite Beatles song is Let it Be.

I did see the Rolling Stones in concert back in 1998 and they were awesome! They have certainly stood the test of time.

Do You Know What Your Kid Is Watching?

Last Friday afternoon my oldest daughter, who is now 17, was laying on our couch watching MTV. Normally I have that channeled blocked on the living room TV because I do not want my younger daughter watching it but since she was gone I unblocked it. I decided to sit down and have a look see to what was going on with the old MTV channel.

My daughter was watching a show by the name of 16 and Pregnant. Honestly I was sickened by this show. I watched maybe 15 minutes and I made her turn the crap off. The episode I saw had a very pregnant 16 year old shopping with her mom for a prom dress. I am sorry, 16 + pregnant = NO PROM in my little world. What is wrong with some of these parents?

The only good thing I have to say about this show is that I was able to ask my daughter what her opinion on teen pregnancy was. I was glad to hear that she wants no part of it. At least she is smart enough to tell me what I want to hear! One of her friends already had a pregnancy scare this summer and from what I understand this friend was actually disappointed that she wasn’t pregnant!

Do you know what your kid is watching? Man, we have sure come along way from the good old days of Barney and Sesame Street!

Me, Myself And I

Me, Myself and I… I swear my family thinks that phrase means there are 3 of me! I am also starting to think that my kitchen has a giant magnetic force to it when I enter!

It never fails, the minute I walk into the kitchen my husband and both of my daughters seem to follow me within seconds! Then they all want to start talking to me. All three of them at the same time! Then they each complain that I am not listening to them!

Last night I finally lost it! I went into the kitchen to start dinner when the magnetic force pulled them into the kitchen with me. My husband started telling me about another dumb ass thing Obama did, my oldest daughter started in about having her phone privileges taken away and my youngest daughter was asking me about her birthday party plans for next week. All of them at the same time! 

I stood there in the middle of my kitchen and yelled, “Shut up” at the top of my lungs! I told them from now on if I was in the kitchen they were only allowed in one at a time! I also told them from now on I only speak to one person at a time! If I am not looking directly at you then do not speak to me!

All three of them left the kitchen rather swiftly. My husband had the nerve to tell my girls that I was just PMSing. I quickly responded, “I am sure that a PMS defense will stand up at your murder trial!”

I seriously need this sign!

Video Of The Week

Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

Gone, Gone, Gone

It’s Only A Game

In my family we are very competitive. When we play games we play to win! There is no such thing as letting someone win, not even the kids. They must learn from experience and master whatever it is they are playing on their own.

With all that being said, I AM PISSED! For the first time as a mother one of my kids beat me at miniature golf. It couldn’t even be the oldest one either, NO, it had to be my youngest daughter. Sure, go ahead and rub salt into the wound!

My youngest daughter was all excited when we went to our favorite mini-golf course down in Galveston this past weekend because she got to play her favorite course. They have two courses there, The Ocean Side and the Jungle Side. We normally play the Jungle Side but because it was so hot we decided to play the Ocean Side and take advantage of the sea breeze.

I knew it was going to be a tough day when on the first hole I started pulling my ball to the left for a score of 4 and she made a hole in one! I did not let that dampen my spirit at all and I came back from that with a few hole in ones myself. She was a child on a mission and just flat out scored me. She beat me by 3 strokes!

The worse part was we had money on the line and I had to pay her a dollar! When I paid up to the little mob queen she looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Nice doing business with you and just remember Mom, It’s only a game!”

Oh, shut up! Damn kid!

Video Of The Week

New Zoo Review

The After Show!

Question Of The Week

Question of the week: Who’s poster did you have hanging up in your school locker or your room when you were a teen?

school lockerA friend’s locker in 9th grade with C.Thomas Howell and Corey Hart posters.

When I was a teen I loved Duran Duran and C. Thomas Howell. My room was plastered in posters of them.

My oldest daughter has posters of Twilight all over her room. My youngest daughter has Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers on her walls. 

Mother Vs. Teen Daughter

In school I learned all about conflict, you know, Man vs. Man, Man vs. Nature, Man vs. Society, Man vs. Himself. What I didn’t learn about in school was the most important conflict of all: Mother vs. Teen Daughter!

My oldest daughter and I have reached a point where we can walk into the same room and look at each other and just want to kill each other! I am not sure if it is a clash of raging hormones or just a stage in life that is normal.

Last week I was told:

  • “Your rules suck!”  My reply: “Well then don’t inhale!”
  • “When I have kids I am going to let them do whatever they want!” My reply: “Well don’t count on me baby sitting for ya!”
  • “I never have any money to do anything!” My reply: “I have just one little word for you JOB!”

The thing I hate the most that she does lately is when you tell her something she always has to say something back! Example: I say “Put the dishes away.” to which she replies “Why do you have to run the dishwasher every single day?!”

My new policy is: “Unless I ask you a question do not make a comment when I tell you something!”

Video Of The Week

Davy & Goliath II – Pet Cemetery

Mad TV Spoof

Question Of The Week

Question of the week: Cake or Pie? What flavor?

keep_your_fork_theres_pie_cat.jpg image by Kittysquared

This is one of those “Great Debates” in my house! Cake or Pie? I love Angel Food Cake drizzled with strawberries. I am not too fond of cake with a bunch of icing on it. My other favorite cakes are Italian Cream Cake and any type of Cheese Cake.

As for pie, I could take it or leave it. I do like a good warm Cherry pie and on Thanksgiving I have to have a Mince Meat pie.